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Two guys walk onstage. One brags about his fantastic physique, every now and then flexing his muscles or striking a manly pose. The second fellow wants to know what he has to do to develop such a great body. The first tells him the secret: "Every night, before I go to bed, I rub down with oil. Try it and let me know how it works." Later, both enter, but the second is crawling on his knees. "I shrank!" he wails. "I though you said it would work!" "Well, what did you use?" asks the first. "Crisco," he answers. "Dummy! That's shortening!" replies the first.